These days, I'm feeling a lot like a sparrow. I love to spend time outside. I love my garden. I love to just sit and enjoy my surroundings. I suppose as the years advance, I've become more aware of the little things I usually fly right past ... like the birds ... as long as they stay out of my strawberries. But, nevertheless, I love listening to them and watching them. I'm awed by the beauty of the doves and robins and cardinals. We even have quite a few hummingbirds. It's funny though. The birds that don't cause me to stop and look are the sparrows. Not particularly God's most awe-inspiring creation. Their voice isn't anything to write home about. They aren't beautifully colored or large or unique in any way. Just small, non-descript, brown birds.
I find myself feeling much the same way these days. Small, non-descript ... no beautiful color or voice that would turn heads. Yet, in scripture, God uses the example of the sparrow to tell us how very much He cares for us.
I am up this morning, early, to share a true-life sparrow story. In case I'm not the only small, non-descript, colorless sparrow out there, I hope this will encourage you, as it did me.
Last weekend, my youngest son and I dedicated an entire Saturday afternoon to cleaning out his room. And boy did we clean. The back of my van is loaded with charitable donations ... from toys to school supplies to clothes. I was feeling really good about the accomplishment until last night. I talked to my Mom because my son is going home with them after school today to spend the weekend in celebration of the end of school. We were making the logistic plans when she mentioned some computer game gifts cards he had gotten from my sister for Christmas. She wanted him to bring them so he could play on their computer. You know grandmothers actually take time to watch the weather for the next seven days so they'll know how to plan. Maybe I'll be that organized someday! But immediately my mind began a "mental search" for the gift cards. I hung up the phone, drug myself upstairs with one goal ... to find those cards. My son, of course, was already asleep, so I turned on a lamp in his room and began the search. He opened his eyes and I asked him about the gift cards. His weary finger pointed to a red drawer in a small bookshelf. His head fell back on the pillow. I opened the drawer, knowing that we had cleaned out the contents and replaced them with the supplies for his latest craft endeavor. I spent a few more minutes looking in other places, knowing all along that the cards weren't there.
I went to bed thinking about those silly cards. Where could they be? I would have NEVER gotten rid of perfectly good gift cards! What would I tell his grandmother tomorrow? How irresponsible I am that I can't keep up with four gift cards? Just before I collapsed into my nightly coma, I told God how great it would be if He would find those cards for me. I had no idea where to look.
5:00am. God woke me up. Go look in the big green trash can, He said. The cards are in the trash bag where you put all those old coloring books. I looked at the clock. I knew I would not be able to go back to sleep. So I tip-toed out of bed (if I woke my husband he would surely think I was crazy for digging through trash at 5am), and went to the garage. Yesterday was trash day, but I'd noticed our trashcan wasn't out at the curb when I got home. It has been an unusually hectic week, and with the holiday, I thought my husband had simply forgotten to take it out. But, when I looked, the trashcan was gone from it's home in the garage. Where was it?
After the fog began to lift from my mind, I thought, why would he put out the trash today? Trash day was yesterday? Then it hit me. The holiday. Monday was a holiday, so trash day is delayed a day. I looked out the front window and there it was, parked by the curb. Well, I had no choice but to go rummage through it. I decided to use the street lights and moon to illumine my search, so I would leave it on the street. I also determined that putting on clothes would be a good a idea in case an over-zealous police officer were to consider me a vandal. As I dressed, my mind rehearsed the trash that had been put in the big green can throughout the week.
As I dug (to the very bottom, of course), I was relieved to find, with the exception of a few dried up weeds out of the yard, all the bags still neatly tied. I pulled out a bag and knew it was the one containing the discarded coloring books. I began my search, grateful that all the bag's contents were only paper and cardboard! Funny how a grown woman can get so excited over something so minor. When my eyes spotted those cards, you'd have thought I'd won the lottery.
Coming back inside and slipping back into bed, I was suddenly overcome with God's love for me. I had to get up and come share it. As I thought about four gift cards that had been lovingly purchased and had provided so much enjoyment for my son, I realized just how personal God is. I had prayed and asked Him to help me find what was lost. You see, one of the Old Testament names for God is "El-Roi". That means "The God Who Sees." Remember the story of Sarah and Hagar? Sarah had been barren when God promised Abraham, her husband that they would have descendants numbering more than the stars in the sky. When Abraham told Sarah what God had said, she laughed ... she was already very old and had never borne a child. Then she decided to take God's promise into her own hands, and give her hand-maiden, Hagar, to Abraham. That way Abraham could have a child with her instead. That really wasn't the way God had planned, and after Hagar had conceived Abraham's child, Sarah became angry and jealous and had Abraham send Hagar away. As the exile was sitting in the desert, God spoke to Hagar and told her that He saw her and the pain and despair that she was experiencing. (Genesis 16).
I have called upon my El-Roi many times to help me through really rough seasons. I know finding lost gift cards seems trivial when so many people need a true miracle to simply survive. But what I think God showed me in this small experience is how intimately involved He is in my life. He cares about the little things in my life, and He does take time to listen and answer my prayer. I was also reminded about how beautifully He orchestrates the timing of our life. Had there not been a Monday holiday, the trash would have already gone. Had my Mom not asked about the gift cards, we wouldn't have thought about them until after school was out and it would have been too late.
I'm asking God for some really big things these days. Sometimes I can grow weary and discouraged as I pray. Then, I have an experience like this. God reminds me that He is there listening and answering my prayers. He has the circumstances in the palm of His Hand. His timing is absolutely perfect. He uses even the small things to reveal Himself, His nature and His character to me.
"Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." Luke 12:6-8
Be blessed today, fellow sparrows!
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